Silver or Gold
by danniperson
Summary: Harry has to choose between the life he always dreamed of, and the one he wants now. SSHP


After the war, the road of Harry Potter's life branched. It branched into endless possibilities. Some paths were green grass and sunshine, some dirt roads and cloudy skies. One path shone brighter than them all. It was a walkway of gold shimmering in the yellow sunlight. Harry knew precisely where that road led. It was the path to the life he had always envisioned for himself.

Beside that golden pathway was another. Darker, but equally prominent, veiled by a glittering silver mist too thick to see beyond. That option held more mystery, offering more questions than promises. Only hopeful possibility could be offered, nothing more. There would be no knowing unless he turned away from every other path.

Harry slowed his walk to approach the diverging paths. Other roads fell away as he passed them by, fading to nothing.

He saw gold in his peripheral when entering auror training. Their savior, the wizard who had defeated Voldemort, was destined for a life of greatness in law enforcement. Who better to hunt dark wizards than the one who had felled the darkest of them?

He saw gold glinting in the red of Ginny's hair as she tossed it over her shoulder and smiled at him. Who better suited for the great hero than such a fierce and independent witch? One as beautiful and talented and witty as Ginny? When she went into Quidditch training, he saw their future unfold in a haze of gold. A white dress, she more lovely than ever, he officially joining his surrogate family. They would have two or three children, at least a boy and a girl. Harry would at last have the family he never had as a child, and in turn would give his own children everything he missed out on. The Potter line would continue. It had to.

Buying the ring felt more like obligation. The golden band glinted blindingly in the sunlight. Tendrils of golden light from the golden path reached out to him.

Puffs of silver smoke burned his eyes, burned his skin, whenever he met with Severus Snape. Their companionship towards the end of the war turned rocky friendship. Only the sharp obsidian in that pale face pierced through the silver haze, leading him forward. They beckoned to him in the darkness. They plucked the taut strings of his soul like a violin, until he thrummed with the music of lust.

It shamed him, confused him, enthralled him. The air they shared was thick, smoky, silver promise.

When Headmistress McGonagall wrote with her offer of the Defense Against the Dark Arts position, the scroll looked silver bathed in the moonlight. Just because he had taught the D.A. five years ago did not mean he would make a good teacher. Even if he did, surely his talents would be wasted there. He could do so much good in the world at the Ministry. It was his destiny, wasn't it, to always fight off the dark?

Eventually Harry could walk no further without choosing. He stood before the two roads. Here, at the end of the Burrow's staircase, it was decision time.

Gold to his right. The laughter of friends and family. The weight of their expectation upon him. Everyone was out in the garden preparing to celebrate his and Ron's completion of the auror program. Their official job offers had been owled that morning. Harry clutched the letter in one hand. The ring box was in his pocket, vibrating, ready to chain him to the perfect life.

Ginny entered, beaming at him. Come to collect him for the party. Harry squared himself, walking to meet her. Crumpling the letter, he let it fall into the bin. When he spoke to her, he watched the golden road crack, shaken as by an earthquake. Ginny was too strong, too proud to cry for him. The shining of her eyes was not gold, but heartbroken tears she held at bay.

His future children turned to smoke. His impressive career prospects in flames. Molly's warm hugs, big Christmas gatherings, his place in a family, every dream he'd ever had as a child crumbling with the golden road.

All he could hope for was that the Weasleys would still be there on his new path.

Leaving Ginny alone in the kitchen, he sneaked out of the front door, Disapparating outside the gate. It wasn't until he tossed the golden ring into a nearby pond that the golden road finally began to fade away. The silver swirled darkly ahead of him, whispers of seduction and menace louder the closer he got.

Harry picked up speed with every step, until he was bursting through the mist at a run. Warm sunlight cleared the silver haze from his eyes. The silver road was in actuality a plain sidewalk. His trainers pounded against the concrete, skidding as he turned too fast, darting across bright green grass.

By the time he clutched the wooden fence, he was breathless. Patiently he waited as the wards alerted the homeowner.

Severus Snape rose gracefully from his garden. In one white hand draped a pitch black flower he had never seen before, its long petals draping across his palm, curling where they dangled off of his hand. In his other, pruning sheers glinted sharply silver in the sunlight.

Madness had gripped him, to bring him here this way. Harry clutched the wooden fence for dear life, meeting the magnetizing obsidian. Calling to him now louder than ever, burning him to the core. Severus stalked forward like a predator, like a dancer, equal parts grace and domination. Harry shivered in delight.

The other wizard's hands were cold, even in this warmth. They set aside his load, then came to rest on the wooden fence beside his own. Harry waited as the man looked down at him, scrutinizing him. The words he wanted to speak were endless, but clogged in his throat. Too much to say, and he didn't know where to start, wasn't sure he could speak even if he found the way.

The backs of cool fingers brushing across his flushed cheeks. Tall, thin body stepping closer to his own. Harry dared to flick out his little finger, stroking Severus's thumb with it. The thumb caught his finger. Thin lips ghosted across his own, breathing poisoned potential and healing hope into his mouth.

Harry chased that potential and that hope, sliding his arms around Severus's neck, pouring every unspoken word into their connection. Severus's arms snaked around his waist and as he pulled, Harry obediently lifted his feet. Harry was flying, lifted into the air, far away from every other life he could have had. As his feet touched the ground on the other side of the fence, he was committed to the new road.

It was not the direction he thought his life would take, but he was excited to see where it might lead him.


End file.
